its what my life is all about

2 more weeks to go :S

2012-02-11T22:04:00.000-08:00

im not sure what mood am i in right now.. i dont really feel good.. my driving lessons has be delay untill march.. a lot has to be done.. im not sure what i should do right now.. i dont even start packing yet thats the not really good part. i think all my stuffs are enough. hmmm lacking of prayer right now :( im just hoping that i could change asap.. arghhh i think i should be in the bad mood ): ARGGHHH!

Ya Allah Please Show Me The Way (:

2012-02-07T01:01:00.001-08:00

CINTAILAH RASULULLAH….
kerana baginda sangat menyangi kita….

Dari Abbas r.a bersabda

“Org yang pertama dibangkitkan dari kubur pada hari kiamat ialah MUHAMMAD SAW. Jibrail as akan datang kepadanya membawa seeokor Buraq. Israfil datang kepadanya membawa bendera dan mahkota.Izrail datang membawa pakaian pakaian syurga.

Israfil bersuara:
“Wahai roh yang baik ! kembalilah ke tubuh yang baik”
maka kubur terbelah dua.

Pada seruan yang kedua pula
kubur mula terbongkar.

pada seruan yang ke3
Ketika Rasulullah saw berdiri.. Baginda telah membuang tanah di atas kepala dan janggut baginda saw. Baginda saw melihat kanan dan kiri. Baginda dapati tiada lagi bagunan lalu Baginda menangis sehingga mengalir lah air matanya ke pipi.

Baginda bersabda:
Kekasihku Jibrail as ! Gembirakalah aku..

Jibrail as berkata “Apakah yang kamu lihat dihadapanmu?
Baginda bersabda :
“Bukan seperti itu maksud pertanyaanku..”

Jibrail as berkata :
“Apakah kamu tidak dapat melihat bendera kepujian yang terpacak di atasmu?”
Baginda bersabda :
“Bukan itu maksud pertanyaanku”

Baginda bersabda :
“Aku bertanya kepada mu akan UMATKU…Di mana perjanjian mereka..?”

Baginda bersabda :
“Nescahaya akan kuatlah pertolongan pada hari ini.. Aku akan mensyafaatkan UMATku..”

Jibrai as menyeru :
” Wahai sekalian makhluk!! Datanglah kamu semua ke tempat perhimpunan yang telah disediakan oleh Allah swt..”

Umat2 datang di dalam keadaan satu-satu kumpulan.

setiap kali Nabi MUHAMMAD akan bertanya…

“Dimanakah UMAT ku?”

Jibrail as berkata :
“Wahai MUHAMMAD SAW.. umatmu adalah umat yang terakhir.”

Apabila Nabi isa datang
Jibrail as menyeru
“tempatmu”
Maka Nabi isa as dan jibrail as menangis .

Nabi MUHAMMAD SAW berkata :
“Mengapa kamu menangis..Dimana Umatku?”
Jibrail berkata :
“Mereka semua telah datang . Mereka berjalan lambat dan perlahan.”

Apabila mendengar cerita demikian nabi MUHAMMAD SAW menangis lalu bertanya
“Wahai Jibrail ! Bagaimana keadaan umatku yang berbuat dosa?”
Jibrail as berkata :
” Lihatlah mereka wahai MUHAMMAD SAW..”

Nabi MUHAMMAD SAW bertemu dengan umatnya yang berdosa.
Mereka menangis serta memikul beban di atas belakang mereka sambil menyeru
” Wahai MUHAMMAD SAW…..”

Nabi MUHAMMAD SAW bersabda :
” Wahai Umatku……”

mereka berkumpul di sisinya.. Umat2nya menangis.

Allah Taala berfirman
“Di dalam keadaan Dia amat mengetahui sesuatu yang tersembunyi..
dimana umat MUHAMMAD SAW..”

Jibrail as berkata :
“Mereka adalah sebaik umat..”

Allah Taala berfirman :
“Wahai Jibrail ! Katakanlah kepada kekasihku MUHAMMAD SAW.. umatnya akan datang untuk ditayangkan di hadapanku.”

Jibrail as kembali di dalam keadaan menagis lalu berkata :

” Wahai MUHAMMAD SAW..Umatmu telah datang untuk ditayangkan kepada Allah Taala”

Nabi MUHAMMAD SAW berpaling ke arah umatnya lalu berkata :

“Sesungguhnya kamu telah dipanggil untuk dihadapkan kepada Allah Taala..”

Allah Taala berfirman :

“Pada hari ini kami akan membalas setiap jiwa dengan apa yang telah mereka usahakan,,Hari ini Aku akan memuliakan sesiapa yang mentaatiKu..dan Aku akan mengangkat sesiapa yang menderhaka terhadapKu..”

Suara dan jeritan dan tangisan semakin kuat..

Nabi MUHAMMAD SAW menyeru..
“Tuhan!! penciptaku..penghuluku…..Aku tidak meminta untuk diriku sesungguhnya aku meminta umntuk umatku dariMu..”

ketika itu juga Neraka Jahanam berseru
“siapakah yang memberi syafaat kepada umatnya?”

Neraka berseru :
“Wahai tuhanku!!Pengusahaku!!Penghuluku..selamatkan lah MUHAMMAD SAW dan umatnya dari siksaanya..selamatkan mereka dari kepanasanku..bara apiku..penyiksaanku..dan azabku..sesunggunya mereka adalah umat yang lemah..mereka tidak dapat tahan dengan siksaan.

Air mata nabi MHAMMAD SAW telah hilang dan kering dari pipinya..

Baginda bersujud dihadapan arsy Allah…
Sekali lagi baginda rukuk untuk memberi syafaat bagi umatnya..

Para nabi melihat keluh kesah dengan tangisanya

Meereka berkata
“Maha suci Allah..Hamba yang paling dimuliakan Allah Taala ini begitu mengambil berat keadaan umatnya..

Fatimah pernah bertanya
“Dimanakah aku ingin mendapatkanmu pada hari kiamat nanti wahai bapaku”

Baginda menjawab :
” kamu akan menjumpai aku di sebuah telaga ketika aku sedang memberi minum umatku..”

Tatkala umat MUHAMMAD saw sedang mencari mimbar nabi MUHAMMAD SAW untuk mendapatkan syafaat pada hari kiamat,
Mariam, Aisyah,Khadijah dan Fatimah sedang duduk.

Ketika Mariam melihat umat nabi MUHAMMAD SAW..dia berkata :
“Ini umat NABI MUHAMMAD..mereka telah sesat dari nabi mereka.”

suara mariam telah didengari oleh nabi adam..

nabi adam berkata kepada nabi muhammad..
“ini umatmu wahai muhammad..mereka berkeliling mencari mu untuk meminta syafaat kepada Allah taala.”

Nabi MUHAMMAD saw menjerit dari atas mimbar lalu bersabda :

“Marilah kepada ku wahai umatku wahai sesiapa yang beriman yang tak pernah melihatku..Aku tidak pernah lari daripada kamu melainkan aku sentiasa mohon kepada Allah ”

Umat nabi MUHAMMAD SAW berkumpul di sisinya.

Ketika di pangkal sirat
Nabi MUHAMMAD SAW bersabda kepada malaikat malik :

“Wahai Malik.. dengan kebenaran Allah Taala..palingkanlah wajahmu dari umatku sehingga mereka dapat melepasi..jika tidak mereka akan gementar apabila melihatmu.”

Nabi MUHAMMAD SAW berhenti di atas sirat .
Setiap kali baginda melihat seorang dari umatnya bergayut di atas sirat .
Baginda akan menarik tanganya dan membangunkanya kembali ..

Nabi Muhammad berkata…
“Ya Tuhan…SELAMATKAN MEREKA..SELAMATKAN MEREKA..SELAMATKAN MEREKA”
“Tuhan..SELAMATKANLAH MEREKA …SELAMATKANLAH MEREKA..SELAMATKANLAH MEREKA.

kredit: http://akuislam.com/blog/perkongsian-artikel/mencintaimu-sepertimana-kau-mencintaiku/#ixzz1lgWYOSdF

ALL PRAISES TO ALLAH

2012-02-05T22:35:00.000-08:00

my travel agency (:

All Praises to Allah (:

Alhamdulillah (: All praises to Allah :) One visa is done 1 more to go! My friends and families i really hope for your prayer for me and my mum.. Insyaallah we are going on this 27 Feb.. Please pray for our safety and our health. Im holding a big responsibility all the while when im there.. Insyaallah this is my first time travel that far for Ibadah. May Allah make it easier for me and the others. Really hope that you can sedekah your dua for everyone while we are there. Dua for us to go there easy and come back easy. Yes im didnt have much ilmu but Insyaallah i will use all the ilmu that ive learn there till the end of my life.. Very high risk of going but I believe death are at Allah's hand. If we die in their hand which means its all destiny.. Insyallah i will do my very best upon this 2 weeks of ibadah... Again i really hope for your dua(:

Selamat Menyambut Maulidur Rasul

2012-02-04T17:58:00.000-08:00

Tarikh 12 Rabiulawal menjadi saksi kepada dua sejarah yang sangat besar iaitu kelahiran dan kewafatan nabi junjungan seluruh umat Islam iaitu Nabi Muhammad S.A.W. Alhamdulillah saya beruntung dilahirkan sebagai seorang Islam dan saya berharap dapat berakhir sebagai orang Islam. SAYA Sebagai orang yang bergelumang melakukan dosa, Rasulullah S.A.W. menjadi pedoman agar saya berubah menjadi yang lebih baik.

Mengenangkan segala pengorbanan Rasulullah yang tidak dapat saya balas, saya hanya dapat mencari jalan agar terus mencintai Allah dan Rasulullah. sebab

Tidak lah sempurna iman seseorang jika dia tidak mencintai Allah dan Rasulullah sebelum kedua ibu bapanya. Ya Rasulullah saya masih mencari jalan ke arah kebenaran. Saya masih belum dapat mencontohi segala sunnah mu. Tetapi saya akan terus berusaha untuk berubah ke arah kebaikan. Insyaallah! Ya Rasulullah please be my role model till my last breath. Ya Rasulullah I want to be a good Muslim. I want to meet you. I want death to be a happy introduction to my new life in barzakh. i want to meet you Ya Rasulullah. Insyaallah I WILL MEET YOU ONE DAY YA RASULULLAH S.A.W.!

Salam Maulidur Rasul . . .
Mari la kita berselawat utk Rasullullah S.A.W ~

اللَّهُمَّ صَلِّ عَلَى مُحَمَّدٍ وَعَلَى آلِ مُحَمَّدٍ، كَمَا صَلَّيْتَ عَلَى إِبْرَاهِيمَ وَآلِ إِبْرَاهِيمَ، إِنَّكَ حَمِيدٌ مَجِيدٌ، وَبَارِكْ عَلَى مُحَمَّدٍ وَعَلَى آلِ مُحَمَّدٍ، كَمَا بَارَكْتَ عَلَى إِبْرَاهِيمَ وَآلِ إِبْرَاهِيمَ، إِنَّكَ حَمِيدٌ مَجِيدٌ

If your Imaan was strong you would never have doubts about the Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa aalihi wa sallam
Imam Asim Hussain.

Messenger Of Allah

“O Allāh, shower blessings and peace and mercy on our master and chief - Muḥammad, the best of creation, and his family, with every glance and every breath, as many times as the number of all things encompassed within the knowledge of Allāh.”

Ya Rasulullah S.A.W.

2012-02-03T06:11:00.000-08:00

Adasebuah kisah tentang cinta yang sebenar-benar cinta yang dicontohkan Allahmelalui kehidupan Rasul-Nya. Pagi itu, walaupun langit telah mulai menguning,burung-burung gurun enggan mengepakkan sayap.

Pagiitu, Rasulullah dengan suara terbatas memberikan kutbah;

Wahaiumatku, kita semua ada dalam kekuasaan Allah dan cinta kasih-Nya. Maka taatidan bertaqwalah kepada-Nya. Kuwariskan dua perkara pada kalian, Al Qur’an dansunnahku. Barang siapa mencintai sunnahku, bererti mencintai aku dan kelakorang-orang yang mencintaiku, akan masuk syurga bersama-sama aku.”

Khutbahsingkat itu diakhiri dengan pandangan mata Rasulullah yang tenang dan penuhminat menatap sahabatnya satu persatu. Abu Bakar menatap mata itu denganberkaca-kaca, Umar dadanya naik turun menahan nafas dan tangisnya. Usmanmenghela nafas panjang dan Ali menundukkan kepalanya dalam-dalam. Isyarat itutelah datang, saatnya sudah tiba. “Rasulullah akan meninggalkan kitasemua,” keluh hatisemua sahabat kala itu. Manusia tercinta itu, hampir selesai menunaikantugasnya di dunia.

Tanda-tandaitu semakin kuat, tatkala Ali dan Fadhal dengan cergas menangkap Rasulullahyang berkeadaan lemah dan goyah ketika turun dari mimbar. Di saat itu, kalaumampu, seluruh sahabat yang hadir di sana pasti akan menahan detik-detikberlalu. Matahari kian tinggi, tapi pintu rumah Rasulullah masih tertutup.Sedang di dalamnya, Rasulullah sedang terbaring lemah dengan keningnya yangberkeringat dan membasahi pelepah kurma yang menjadi alas tidurnya.

Tiba-tibadari luar pintu terdengar seorang yang berseru mengucapkan salam. “Bolehkah saya masuk?” tanyanya. Tapi Fatimah tidakmengizinkannya masuk, “Maafkanlah, ayahku sedang demam,” kata Fatimah yang membalikkan badandan menutup pintu.

Kemudiania kembali menemani ayahnya yang ternyata sudah membuka mata dan bertanya padaFatimah, “Siapakah itu wahai anakku?” “Taktahulah ayahku, orang sepertinya baru sekali ini aku melihatnya,” tutur Fatimah lembut. Lalu, Rasulullahmenatap puterinya itu dengan pandangan yang menggetarkan. Seolah-olah bahagiandemi bahagian wajah anaknya itu hendak dikenang.

“Ketahuilah,dialah yang menghapuskan kenikmatan sementara, dialah yang memisahkan pertemuandi dunia. Dialah malakul maut,” kataRasulullah. Fatimah pun menahan ledakan tangisnya. Malaikat maut datangmenghampiri, tapi Rasulullah menanyakan kenapa Jibril tidak ikut samamenyertainya. Kemudian dipanggillah Jibril yang sebelumnya sudah bersiap diatas langit dunia menyambut roh kekasih Allah dan penghulu dunia ini.

“Jibril,jelaskan apa hakku nanti di hadapan Allah?” Tanya Rasululllah dengan suara yang amatlemah. “Pintu-pintu langit telah terbuka,para malaikat telah menanti rohmu. Semua syurga terbuka lebar menantikedatanganmu,” kataJibril.

Tapiitu ternyata tidak membuatkan Rasulullah lega, matanya masih penuh kecemasan.“Engkau tidak senang mendengarkhabar ini?” TanyaJibril lagi. “Khabarkan kepadaku bagaimana nasibumatku kelak?” “Jangan khuatir, wahai Rasul Allah,aku pernah mendengar Allah berfirman kepadaku: ‘Kuharamkan syurga bagi siapasaja, kecuali umat Muhammad telah berada di dalamnya,” kata Jibril.

Detik-detiksemakin dekat, saatnya Izrail melakukan tugas. Perlahan roh Rasulullah ditarik.Nampak seluruh tubuh Rasulullah bersimbah peluh, urat-urat lehernya menegang.“Jibril, betapa sakit sakaratul mautini.” PerlahanRasulullah mengaduh. Fatimah terpejam, Ali yang di sampingnya menunduk semakindalam dan Jibril memalingkan muka. “Jijikkah kau melihatku, hingga kaupalingkan wajahmu Jibril?” TanyaRasulullah pada Malaikat Penghantar Wahyu itu. “Siapakah yang sanggup, melihat kekasih Allah direnggutajal,” kata Jibril.

Sebentarkemudian terdengar Rasulullah memekik, kerana sakit yang tidak tertahankanlagi. “Ya Allah, dahsyat rasa maut ini, timpakan saja semuasiksa maut ini kepadaku, jangan pada umatku.” Badan Rasulullah mulai dingin, kakidan dadanya sudah tidak bergerak lagi. Bibirnya bergetar seakan-akan hendakmembisikkan sesuatu. Ali segera mendekatkan telinganya, “Uushiikumbis shalati, wa maa malakat aimanuku” – “Peliharalah shalat dan peliharalahorang-orang lemah di antaramu.”

Diluar pintu tangis mulai terdengar bersahutan, sahabat saling berpelukan.Fatimah menutupkan tangan di wajahnya, dan Ali kembali mendekatkan telinganyake bibir Rasulullah yang mulai kebiruan, “Ummatii, ummatii, ummatiii” –“Umatku, umatku, umatku…” Dan,berakhirlah hidup manusia mulia yang memberi sinaran itu.

Kini,mampukah kita mencintai sepertinya? Allahumma solli ‘ala Muhammad wa baarik wasalim ‘alaihi… Betapa cintanya Rasulullah kepada kita. Kirimkan kepadasahabat-sahabat muslim lainnya agar timbul kesedaran untuk mencintai Allah danRasul-Nya, seperti Allah dan Rasulnya mencintai kita. Kerana sesungguhnyaselain daripada itu hanyalah fana belaka.

*article taken from other blog

pilunya rasa hati bila baca article ni... kenapa teenagers skarang cari teman lelaki? kalaulah mereka tahu betapa besarnya kasih sayang Rasulullah S.A.W kepada umatnya mesti mereka tak cari yang lain dah eaann?? kalau lahh mereka tahu betapa besarnya pengorbanan Nabi kpd umat beliau mesti setiap benda yang dilakukan tidak pernah bertentangan dengan syarak.. tapi apa pengorbanan yang telah kita lakukan untuk Rasulullah S.A.W.? kita tidak pernah berhenti buat salah tapi Rasulullah tidak pernah berhenti meluahkan kasih sayang kpd kita.. tapi pernah ke hargai? cuba buka mata luas2... tgk apa yg terjadi politik menyebabkan orang Islam hidup berpuak-puak. sampaikan ada perkara seperti solat jumaat 2 imam terjadi? perkara seperti ini menyebabkan org kafir gembira.. adakah itu yang kita mahukan??? angkara bola sepak sampai sanggup bergaduh? inikah yang orang Islam mahukan? pernah tak dengar Allah tidak akan membantu kamu selagi kamu tidak bersatu padu. my dearest brother and sister wake up! this is not the time to be selfish. this is about our religion, our akidah!Rasulullah will be so sad when he see all this... Please wake up to make him happy. come back to reality life. Work together! we shouldnt be apart that is wrong! we shouldnt care our different opinions in politic but we should think of what Rasulullah said.. Muslimin muslimat, lets change! (:

22 MARCH 2012

2012-01-26T20:37:00.000-08:00

SPM results set to be released on March 22.. when my mum showed me this report in newspaper my heart goes LUB-DUB-LUB-DUB im getting nervous yet before this i was waiting any media to announce about it. i cant go back to 30 December 2011.. BUT WHAT I COULD DO IS PRAY AND TAWAKKAL (:

we shouldnt turn back to Allah when we are desperate but we need to remember Allah everyday ..

YA ALLAH, if i got good results all the praises goes to you Yaa Rabb but if i didnt get i did wrong , maybe i didnt work hard enough. When the time comes Ya Rabb whatever my result is PLEASE SAVE ME FROM ANY RIAK FEELINGS OR LOSE HOPE... AMIN

TAWAKKAL TU ALALLAH

START DOA FOR THE BEST (: INSYAALLAH

MY DEAREST BROTHERS AND SISTERS PLEASE PRAY FOR THE BEST FOR ME AND ALL OTHER FORM 5 2011 SO WE COULD PASS THE EXAM WITH FLYING COLOUR INSYAALLAH..

2012-01-26T17:50:00.000-08:00

my dearest friends and family, i need your help... please pray for me everything goes well as planned (: Insyaallah 27 FEB my dream will come true. but i need your help to please pray together with me... They are trying to monopoly us the muslims (: so pray hard for our brothers and sisters there (: and pray for me that i could go there and come back safely Insyaallah (: The dunia is a Hell for the Muslims and Akhirat is heaven for the muslims (: so pray hard my brother and sister.

be patience is the only way (: Insyaallah

i want to be a better person (:

2012-01-23T19:49:00.000-08:00

pray for me (; i want to be a good servant. i want to be a good ummah. i want to show my appreciation to Allah and Rasulullah PBUH. Insyaallah im going to do my best in life.

insyaallah i will go through this difficulties by remember your advice worry ends as faith begins Insyaallah (:

subhanallah! im still finding my personality in my life. please show me the way... AMEEN

Pray! Insyaallah

2012-01-22T23:18:00.000-08:00

hahah saya sayang abang saya!!! hahahaha
one night i was too hungry... n my cousin too LoL!
me : akak saya lapo
cousin : nak makan apa?
me : mcm nak mkn mc donald lahh
cousin : pegi lahh call
me : hmmmm
mcd : kena tunggu 1hr 30mins
me : WHAAAT???nvm tak jadi lah *sms my brother buy me mc donald

after some time...
abg kim : naahh amik ni.. lain kali kalau nak mc donald call lahh..
me : lama
*dlm hati delivery yang ni sampai dlm bilik tak minta duit pun :P hahahahhahah
hihiihi.. SAYA SAYANG AWK!!! :P

RASULULLAH S.A.W.

2012-01-22T03:27:00.000-08:00

Tak terjangkau tinggi pekertimu
Tidak tergambar indahnya akhlakmu
Tidak terbalas segala jasamu
Sesungguhnya engkau rasul mulia
Tabahnya hatimu menempuh dugaan
Mengajar erti kesabaran
Menjulang panji kemenangan
Terukir namamu di dalam Al-Quran

tak lama lagi Maulidur Rasul (: kalau tahun2 sudah aku habiskan masa berselawat dkt sekolah tapi tahun ni tak tau nak sambut dkt mana :( harap2 tahun ni membawa lebih pengertian dalam mengingati Rasulullah s.a.w. saya rindu Rasulullah sangat2! nak jumpa tapi takut sbb diri yg kotor dengan dosa hati yang gelap kerana nafsu. Moga2 Allah membantu menunjukkan aku jalan yang benar, Insyaallah. tadi tgk tv tiba2 ustaz ni cerita sebuah kisah....

" satu hari Rasulullah balik awal, Siti Aisyah pun memberitahu hasratnya kepada Rasulullah s.a.w. dia inginkan Rasulullah s.a.w. berdoa untuknya. Lalu Rasulullah menadahkan tgn dan berdoa ' Ya Allah engkau ampunilah segala dosa yg lepas dan yang akan dtg' lalu siti Aisyah tergelak. Rasulullah oun bertanya mengapa dia gelak, lalu Siti Aisyah memberitahu sesungguhnya doaMu itu pasti dimakbulkan Allah. dan senang untuk Aku pergi ke syurga... lalu Rasulullah s.a.w. berkata setiap kali selepas solat aku membaca doa tersebut untuk umat-umatku..."

Masyaallah! sedangkan Nabi ingatkan umat tapi jarang2 umatnya mengenang jasa baiknya.. apa kata kita pun berdoa dan berselawat ke atas nabi setiap kali selepas solat? *pesanan buat diriku yang hina ini dan teman2 yang lain (:

AMIIIWAAH AKHHYARR :B

2012-01-21T20:25:00.000-08:00

hahahah thanks for ur message yesterday.. it has been a few weeks since the last time i received sms from my friends.. thanks for remembering me hahahhah XD AAAAAWWW, i misss uu tooo :B hahahah nanti kita keluar OK dgn nalina skali taau! HIHIHI :D perlu ke i ajak ur jay jay??? hahahahhah.. dia mesti bz.. HIHI :D tapi i tak sure bila lahh blh kluar tapi kt plan slowly and steadily OK! hahahahXD teruskan kumpul duit ye blh blanja i makan :B movie + bowling skali tauu (:

2012-01-21T20:17:00.000-08:00

january 2012 (:
i dont know how many times i cried.. how much i hurt.. how much i felt despair n everything goes wrong..
Last night i had a dream. a really wonderful dream. i think that would be the best dream ever. Alhamdulillah, Thank You Allah for that dream. that dream last night make me stronger as it make me feels Allah still loves me. Allah wants me to repent and turn to the right path. Allah shows that He was testing my faith. either i'll choose nafsu or iman. Today a spirit came into me. the spirit said never lose hope. keep on with ur patience.. cry to Allah. Ask for Allah forgiveness. Lead ur life in the proper way. the islamic way. i am patiently waiting for my rainbow to come. Today i said to myself smile when u feel like crying. u have been crying almost everyday so now stop crying. Remember Allah who always be by ur side when needed. Its still not too late to turn back.im trying to be a better person. pray for me (: 27 February 2012 i'll patiently wait for you.. Insyaallah everything will go just fine.. i thought of letting one of my friend know what is going on with that date.. im choosing only ONE at least if anything happen to me there is someone know about it (: owhh SPM result i might not make it :( but the 27 Feb mission is so much more important so im just gonna pray hard so that i'll get good results (: AMEEN :)

kadang-kadang Allah bagi hujan turun,
kita tanya mana matahari,
rupa-rupanya Allah nak bagi kita pelangi (:

2012-01-19T18:43:00.000-08:00

people dont know when i cry.. when they find out i cried then they asked why.. i can make 1001 fake reasons why i cried.. then they believe and they leave me behind thinking that they have listen to my problems... i hate crying in front of them which makes me look so not strong and cry for small things.. why dont u put urself in my shoe and tell me how does that feels like? you dont understand how hurt i am. i really thought life after spm is gonna be FUN.. and im wrong a rather go back to school. i rather wake up @ 5.30 and come home at 1.10.. and i rather stay much longer in bio extra class.. when i say life is awful they say ive never appreciate life.. when i cry and nobody knows about it... the feeling how hurt i am which GOD only knows about it.. everyone will say take it easy and patience... yeahh easy to say try to feel it then you know how hard life would be.. i need a shoulder to cry on. a box of tissue.. and i need a pair of ears and a person who really can advice what should i do next... i cant stand more longer.. did anyone know how much fake smiles did i try to make when im sad.. ive been a lot of ups and down.. but i keep it in myself not giving anyone else to hear it. i think im strong enough to cope with it. but deep inside my heart im shouting for a better life. im shouting in pain. but no one really cares.. i cant force them to care.. sometimes i just think i should never come to this world but its too late.. because im not strong enough. and nobody really cares about me.. so when i die no body will ever remember me.. how sad my life really is.. the loudest i can cry is when i put my face onto the pillow and shout out loud.. when no one is at home.. after my prayer.. only one person knows how much im hurt.. how much my life had been disrupted.. ALLAH MY GOD.. he knows everything.. i'll try my best to be the best! sometimes i cant hold it much longer. so i cried. im not a good person. i abuse kids. im just a bad person waiting for my punishment. i dont know where should i cry to.. im so desperate to cry. sometimes i even hate myself. really hate myself. sometimes i just want to meet my prophet and say : Ya Rasulullah im not a good ummah. You know how i feel. Plz show me the way. im not strong as you. but im trying to act like one.. im a bad girl.. but i still adore you.. i love you so much please help me. i dont wanna go to hell. since i was small ive been suffering with a lot of things. and i always make things worse. where can i go? can i stay with you? ' Ya Allah please3 show me the way. im not strong to face all this things. i really need You. i give you my soul fully please guide me. AMIN! guys i really hope you pray the best for me to go through my life..

JOHOR BAHRU

2012-01-19T00:43:00.000-08:00

owhh yeahh!! went back to JB! i miss mak tok, maklong, kak yeen soo much! hahah well i didnt go anywhere just stayed @ home.. but then i learnt a lot there :D of coz.. i learnt cooking with mak tok. this is the 1st time i helped her as my mom is bz n she didnt let me help mak tok bcoz of few reasonsb4 that.. but yeahh i wish i could stay there longer... went visit cik mat @ the hosp. with kak yeen, maklong, mak and paklong.. so yeahh! he was admitted again bcoz of few reasons and yeahh ive been a baby sitter!! baby sit adiel :D soooo cute (: bernostalgia bersama arief.. i did his colouring hw :D well i miss school a lot.. my result will be coming out so SOON!! soo yeah (: PRAY FOR THE BEST (: and yess sebelum this anak kelly kena belasah dgn aku someone PLZ get rid of him from my eyesight!!! he is just torchuring me :(

2012-01-13T07:13:00.000-08:00

satu hari...

buka tv9 ----> tanyalah ustaz pagi2 mana ada citer lain s layan je lahhh..

skali ada penonton tu tanya : ustaz kalau dah lama kahwin masih tak dpt anak apa petua yg dapat diamalkan?

ustaz : setiap pagi minum segelas susu kambing dan makan 7 biji kurma. SUAMI DAN ISTERI

hmm initializing + processing what he said.. out of sudden i asked my mum

me : MAK!!!! kalau mkn apa yg ustaz ckp tu kt dah tak pyh 'buat' lahhh kann!!!

mak : habis tu mcm mana nak dpt anak! dapat anak kurma @ kambing jee lahhh

laugh continuosly after that! hahaah

*if pn lee finds out about this i'll be dead :S hahahha a bio student just said that

thennn:

i was helping my mum cook.. masak sotong kuning :D

me : MAK!! mcm mana nak tau sotong ni dah masak ke belum???

mak : dah masak maksudnya tu dah masak lahh

hahhahhaha cant stop laughing

when i was hanging up the clothes

mak : kau ni sidai baju tak de seni lahhh

in my heart that is why im destined to be in the science class :P hahhahahah

27 FEB 2012

2012-01-12T08:02:00.000-08:00

cepat datang ye! saya akan mempersiapkan diri sebaik mungkin. Dengan izin Allah harap2 semua berjalan lancar! masih banyak yang perlu diperbaiki (: sifat2 mazmumah pun bnyk bersarang lagii dalam diri yang hina ni... banyak persiapan yang belum dilakukan. tapi saya excited! saya betul2 nak pegi (: YA ALLAH MAKBULKANLAH PERMINTAAN HAMBAMU INI AMEEN...
before 24 FEB:
- balik JB
-balik penang
-Shopping apa yg patut
doakan saya semua :D

my 1 day love

2012-01-12T07:36:00.000-08:00

hihih went to an event! omg! i love the way he teach! i love the way he makes jokes! then off to the dreamland and still think about him. DAMN i hate that! it just interrupt my life hahah! i started to find his fb ----> owhh yeah found it! ----> oh no! his in relationship! -----> started laughing -----> i knew we can never be together
from the beginning... hmmm i dont feel sad at all :P thats funny! it looks like experience taught me enough of choosing the right man in life. experience told me to never think of love! experience told me to LOVE ALLAH! experience told me to success in my life than think about this lovey dovey thingy! So im still learning how to LOVE ALLAH! im still learning everything! OK! so now you know why i didnt feel anything when everyone got their couple except me :D i want a guy who respect me as a woman. i want a guy who is loving caring and loves kids coz im not in love with kids. i want a guy who really understand me and accept me the way i am not asking me to be anyone else. i want a guy that will pray for me in every prayer, does not tear off when im dead, put me into the liang lahad and tell the earth to accept me as a mukmin, and doesnt give his love to me at the first place but put Allah, Rasulullah, his parents and can i be next? im a jealous person! VERY! and im very SENSTIVE! so can anyone fulfill this characteristics and i accept him in my life. money doesnt make me happy but the people whom i'll be living with will make me either happy or sad. i think thats kinda too much :P PUT ALLAH AND RASULULLAH FIRST! everything in your life would be easier thats all i need (:

2012-01-09T23:19:00.000-08:00

hidup yang semakin susah setiap hari :( hmm dugaan Allah... sampai satu ketika boleh pulak terkeluar daripada mulut ckp aku ni org paling malang. ASTAGHFIRULLAHALAZIM! hmmm kadang2 bila fikir balik semua yang tak kena semua puncanya aku... nak tabahkan hati tapi mcm mana? can i just borrow ur shoulder for me to cry on, ur ears for u to hear what's my problem, ur heart for u to be sincere with me n can u tell me what i should do in my situation. i just someone for me to tell everything. PLZ i just couldnt stand it anymore. can i just say i surrender? but Allah hate people that putus asa.. Ya Allah! maafkanlah hambaMu ini. Kadang kala tidak tertampung diri hambamu ini dgn dugaanMu tapi hamba pasti dengan kata-kataMu. 'ALLAH TIDAK AKAN MENGUJI HAMBANYA MELAMPAUI SEGALA KEKUATANNYA'. NUR ROSYIIDAH BINTI ABDUL THALIP : jangan putus asa yee!! Allah ada setiap masa!
hmm can i cry! i really wanna cry! una can i tell u my prob right now??? but u r having ur exam!
hmmm every day i cried but no one knows about it except Allah!
1st of all because
- all of them said i didnt save my cat from bitten by the dogs. and it died.. and i love her too much but it died. they said if i save her she would have survive.. DO YOU KNOW HOW HURT IS THAT TO SEE UR LOVED ONES DIED IN FRONT OF UR EYES? do u care what ive gone through? NO! u just said that im sooo useless that i couldnt even help her. DO YOU KNOW HOW SAD I AM? DO YOU CARE? NO U DONT!!!\
- hmm second I HATE CHILDREN AND PEOPLE SAY I ABUSED THEM!! I BULLY THEM! do u care about my feelings? NO U DONT! have u ever asked me why i hate them? NO u dont! u know why? BECAUSE THEIR LOUD VOICES ARE SOOOO ANNOYING! do u care? no u dont! huh than SHUH! every single words that came out from ur mouth will only hurt me so why not u just SHUT UP!
- too private to tell
therefore, im really depressed and i need some space for me. i need some time. I MISS school. i really wanna cry. im not that strong. i need someone to tell to. YA ALLAH HANYA KEPADAMU HAMBA BERMOHON! BANTULAH HAMBA! KUATKAN LAH HATI HAMBA MELALUI SEGALA DUGAANMU INI! AMEEN! YA ALLAH BANTULAH HAMBA! BANTULAH HAMBA!
HOPE : 27 FEBRUARY 2011 insyaallah! (: hamba berserah segalanya kepadaMu Ya Allah!

2012-01-08T05:53:00.000-08:00

i cried for the past few hours :( and cried and cried. it had never been right but no but soo yeah it had never been right since starting of the year. Today a person just add up my responsibility. N that is not so bad until i saw 2 DOGS TRIED TO BITE MY CAT!!!!! now both of them went missing. i cant stop crying. i blame myself for not helping them. i need a shoulder to tell my stories but i didnt want to disturd anyone so now blog is my place. reallyX100 not in a good mood. i dont think im gonna forgive myself if they died. PLZ MY DEAREST CATS PLZ COME HOME!!! i really miss u.. im so sorry for not saving you from the dogs! i cant even think rationally on that time. plz i want you to come back! plz!!!! i had enough losing 3 of your siblings few years back. and i didnt want to lose more. i really had enough n i want you to know that i really love you guys. may Allah punish the dogs!!! AMEEN :( *trauma

someone just made me SMILE (: but still it wouldnt make me feel comfortable but thanks to that guy :D thanks awak! but still im still still still SAD!

2012-01-05T20:33:00.000-08:00

yelahh una!!! nak memujuk lahh tu :P

hahahah a person where i always tell my problems to ----> UNA!! hahah.. thank u for making me smile this morning after a lecture from my mother. a really unpredictable MMS u sent hahah. and thats the last slide :) yelahhh takut lah tu orang merajuk hahahhaha. thanks for being a cousin becomes my best friend that knew every single scene in my life... :DDD

2012-01-04T23:09:00.000-08:00

senyuman yang terukir di bibir, lirik pandangan mata dan raut wajahku langsung tidak dapat menggambarkan hatiku. hatiku yang semakin rapuh akibat menahan sabar rasanya bakal runtuh tidak lama lagi. tiba2 teringat kepada satu ayat yang berbunyi "Allah tidak akan menguji hambaNya dengan dugaan yang tidak dapat ditanggung oleh hambaNya" Allah itu Maha Penyayang tak mungkin akan bertindak kejam. Jadi apa yang dilakukan oleh hatiku yang rapuh ini hanyalah berdoa ' Ya Allah, ampunilah segala dosa hamba. Mungkin ini merupakan balasan atas segala sifat buruk yang hamba lakukan. Ya Allah, engkau telah menutup segala keaiban hambaMu ini tidak dapat hamba membalas segala yang engkau telah lakukan. Ya Allah ampunilah segala dosa kedua-dua ibu bapa hamba dan adik-beradik hamba. Berikanlah kami kekuatan. Hanya kepadaMu hamba memohon. Amin... dugaan yang datang mungkin merupakan jalan Allah ingin menambahkan pahala hambanya atau cara Allah untuk membalas segala dosa hambaNya. Lebih baik diuji di dunia daripada diseksa di akhirat kelak yang sudah tentunya lebih dahsyat. hari ini seorang guru telah menceritakan sebuah kisah kepadaku. seorang nabi*maaf saya kurang pasti nama Nabi tersebut* yang menghidupkan seorang yang telah meninggal dunia. mayat tersebut lalu berkata ' kenapa wahai nabi engkau membangkitkan aku? penatku berdiri selama 70 tahun masih belum habis lagi.' lalu nabi bertanya ' kenapa engkau dihukum untuk berdiri selama 70 tahun?' lalu dia menjawab ' aku dahulunya bekerja sebagai seorang pencari kayu api. apabila kayu api yang telah dikumpulkan lalu salah satu kayu api telah terjatuh. aku pun mula merungut. disebabkan itulah si pencari kayu api itu dihukum oleh Allah untuk berdiri selama 70 TAHUN. kayu api yang terjatuh itu merupakan kehendak Allah dan apabila si pencari kayu api itu merungut maka dia telah merungut tentang Allah. MASYAALLAH! saya rasa kita dah jauh tersasar kan? cepat2 lah bertaubat sebelum ajal datang dan menjemput kita. RENUNG-RENUNGKAN DAN SELAMAT BERAMAL (:

SOLAT

2012-01-03T05:53:00.000-08:00

Solat senang saja disebut. perkataan yg senang diungkapkan. pergerakan yg senang untuk dilakukan. tapi saya nak tanya ada ke org sekarang yg dpt menghayati solat itu? solat lima minit je. sehari lima kali umat islam solat. tapi antara kelima-lima waktu berapa waktu kita dapat khusyuk dalam solat? saya belajar solat sejak kecil. dulu masa saya hampir-hampir beralih dari Iqra kepada Al Quran, Ustaz Rosli ckp saya diturunkan pangkat maksudnya kena turun Iqra balik.. siapa lahh yang tak kecewa kannn!!! tapi sekarang saya sedar tajwid saya tak betul. hukum tajwid yg salah blh mempengaruhi maksud ayat. jadi memang patutlah saya diturunkan pangkat :) berbalik kepada soal solat. sejak belakangan ini, saya rasa hidup saya gelap sangat, dan bila saya berdoa tiba-tiba teringat balik. Rupa-rupanya saya ada berjanji, saya berjanji supaya akan mendekatkan diri dgn Allah lepas SPM sbb masa agak lapang.. tapi saya lupa janji saya... orang yang memungkiri janji salah satu ciri2 munafik.. hmmm astaghfirullahalazim! jadi saya nak kotakan janji saya :D jadi saya pun ikutlah mak saya ke kelas agama... walaupun sikit saya dapat better than nothing kann??Kebetulan ustaz mengajar tafsir.. dia mengajar tafsir doaiftitah… dia ckp selalunya masa solat kita selalu lalai… ingt benda dkt luarsolat.. mmg betullah apa ustaz ckp. Walaupun dah bertahun aku mendirikan solat,erti khusyuk masih belum pernah sebati dalam solatku kalau ada pun jarang2saja. Pernah tak dgr kisah saidina umar. Setiap para sahabat telah beradakhusyuk walaupun hanya berada dlm saf dan belum memulakan solat. Saidina umarakan cek saf setiap jemaah dgn pedang, lalu ada seorang musuh Islam telahmembunuh saidina umar. Para jemaah tidak sedar pun pembunuhan saidina umarsehinggalah saidina umar berteriak kesakitan! Hmm begitulah khusyuknya parasahabat pada zaman dahulu. Tapi kita zaman sekarang? Sendiri fikirlah kann… mengejar nikmat solat telahlama menjadi sasaran aku. Setiap daie yang aku tny cara2 nya pasti menjwabkenal pasti lahh maksud ayat yang dibaca dlm solat. Aku tertanya2 mcm mana nakkhusyuk aku tak pandai Arab pun.. sehinggalah pada akhir tahun 2009 seorangpakar bahasa arab telah mengajarku maksud surah al fatihah. Masyaallah bila akubaca dlm solat sambil mengetahui maksudnya SUBHANALLAH! Sejuknya hati bacasurah tersebut. tapi bila akhirnya surah tu haishhh mulalah melayang-layangfikiran. Betul mmg lahh kita kena faham setiap ayat yg dibaca. *pastikan adaguru yg menterjemahkan setiap maksud dengan betul semasa menterjemah ayat AlQuran. Jadi untuk khusyuk dlm solat kita mestilah faham isi kandungan ayat yangdibaca dlm solat dan untuk memahami ayat Quran mestilah ada usaha. Jadi marilahkita meningkatkan mutu ibadah kita sbb solat itu tiang agama dan solat itudapat mencegah kemungkaran :D pernah sekali saya melihat siaran langsung solatterawih di Masjidil Haram dlm 10 malam terakhir Ramadhan ramai orang Arab yangmenangis semasa ayat Quran dibaca. Alangkah baiknya kalau kita pun dapatmenghayati sama2 bacaan Imam tersebut kan!!

My 2011 (;

2011-12-30T05:31:00.000-08:00

it looks like 2011 is coming to an end.. 2011 a year full laughter, tears and of course MEMORIES (;
2011 means :
- SPM year
-senior year
-my last year as a school student
to me...

my year started with my senior role in prefects... whoah!!!! ORIENTATION CAMP.. i miss this part where we senior being big enough to plan everything for the juniors so that we can enjoy together throughout the camp
well, although it wasnt as amazing as our seniors did for us at least we did enjoy our time with the juniors. PLZ remember we dont bully them we want them to learn about patience, respect and leadership.. we want them to be confident with themselves and brave in solving problems.

NEXT our photography day.. im an ed board member. i knew how tired in this two days handling the photography session.. at least i have my shift unlike my editor and my sub editor.. we coorporate well and we succeed in giving our best during those two days.. FUH!

i can never forget my class.. especially with chaotic life we went through when the teachers came in and when we spent our time together. we share jokes, stories.. we love make fun of others but no offence hahah.. we wanted to be the best class although most of the teachers really had a hard time teaching us.. we can hear complaints from the teachers almost every day.. a day without nagging from the teachers means the 4 of them are missing : arif, tado, kimy and iman hahah

hishhh!!! i miss those moments (; i can never say i hate this class.. i can never say that we never had a great tme together.. BECAUSE AFTER 11 Years of schooling life i knew you guys are always the BEST (Y)
ohh i cant forget the canteen day... the most exhausting day of the year!!!! fuhhh -____-' so i sell fried rice n fried mee. good job u guys.. im sorry for not being a good leader but i really cant do more :( well pn zana scolded me because of the lacking of fried rice and food at my stall. i really tried my best but i couldnt. i was forced to open the stall so just forget it. at least i did my best :D. at the end of the day was a disaster! my very closed junior got MRSM which really ruined the whole day :O so @ last he came back hahhahah :P
well i can never forget the BEST PREFECTS CAMP EVER...
xcellent trainers did a great job in planning our camp (Y)... the first day at the school and the 2nd and 3rd at bukit cerakah shah alam. well of course its amazing. have u ever found a camp held in shopping complex??? yeah we did! we entered PKNS Plaza then off to the water world then Alam sentral (some of us get to play bowling! :D ) then find our own way back to the bukit cerakah :O so we took a jeep with i think 20 people in there :O owh yeah!!! their senamrobik is AWESOME! :D

we seniors we rocks hahah

spending our time together are the greatest time we had

owhh nano dont think i forgot about ur 5 minutes :P owhhh yeahhh i wanted to cilok the pics from ur fb account but its missing SO :(

hmmm next owhh yeahhh!!! how can i forget the best perpaduan camp ever! hahah yeah i had an awesome group and awesome time there... rock eco resort (Y) hahah.. n the last but not least camp is the girl guides day camp (:

hmmm so that is all about camp...

my last hari koku :DDD was also one of the best :D

hohohoh HOW CAN I FORGET THE BEST PREFECTS HI TEA ever??? toink2. credit to all our form 4 juniors. you guys did a great job weyhh!!!

our last installation :( i really hope you guys our juniors keep up with ur good work (:

well i miss those moments (: i cant get back to the beginning but just enjoy every single second im going through. here comes 2012.. hope for the best and do the best (Y)

aim : -increase my iman

- hope for the best for SPM

- enter universitiy

- be a better daughter, sister and friends..

* to those who r gonna celebrate new year i wish you happy new year just dont go overboard kay! well we need to think back new year = a shorter period to the judgement day... so increase ur ibadah my friends (: this is also an advice for me...

L.O.V.E.

2011-12-29T07:21:00.000-08:00

people often say dont write love on the beach coz the wave will wash it away... write ur love in ur heart coz it will never be depleted...

experience made me to be aware of every single feelings toward a guy. i knew how hurt it can be when the person we love betray us. i knew how hurt it would be when we tried to tell the real situation to the person we love but they thought we lied. i knew each and every single feelings when a person we love hurt our feelings.. so i made a decision... i dont wanna love someone until that person really loves me (;

when he texted me i'll jump up and down to my handphone. i'll keep smiling while reading every single word he wrote.. but i knew we can never be together. because i write my love for him on the beach so that the wave will wash it away. im just too scared to be hurt coz the experince teach me to love my self before loving others.. now the main thing is i need to find my way how to love ALLAH before loving myself... LOVE FOR ALLAH WHICH WILL NEVER END (:

oh indonesia

2011-12-26T19:40:00.000-08:00

so i spent 5 days ago in Indonesia.. I shall switch my language :DD OK!
DAY ONE
naik ERL pegi KLIA dgn kak yeen (: then dengan pesawat garuda indonesia kami berlepas ke JAKARTA!! fuyoh excitednya!!!! hahhaah... tapi dlm hati tuhan je lahh yg tau.. apa lahh aku nak buat dkt sana hahahXD hmm sampai2 pegi dkt imigresen kena marah lakk.. menyampah betul pegawai dia suka marah2 orang hahah... fuhh lepas tu jam dia makk aiiii teruknya dahlah penat jalan dari pagi sampai hotel pun dah dekat pukul 6 :( tak sempat buat pape pun malam tu kluar makan jeee :O

hmm malam tu makan seafood SEDAAAPP!!!

DAY TWO

lepas breakfast TERUS PERGI SHOPPING!!! hahahah TANAH ABANG... barang2 dia perghhh BANYAK GILER!!! GUESS?? JIMMY CHOO??? CHANEL?? semua ada tapi tak ori lahh janji boleh guna hihi... di sana lahh bermulanya kisah aku.. dah shopping giler2 tu masa nak balik ni ada budak indon dtg dia ckp : akak, duit kak duit... hati aku remuk.. serba salah nak bagi ke tak.. last2 aku terus jalan langsung tak pandang pun muka budak tu.. dlm hati aku YA ALLAH bukannya aku tak nak bagi tapi aku takut nanti kena ragut lahh rompak ke.. mana lahh tau kann..malam tu aku fikir balik kenapa aku tak bagi budak tu duit sedangkan dia orang susah... kenapa aku boleh beli baju yg harga sampai seratus ribu rupiah tapi 1000 rupiah pun aku tak bagi dia... hmm malam tu aku keluar dgn kak yeen je pegi WTC MANGGA DUA. Mak dgn mak cik tak berapa sihat :O pukul 8 most of their shops dah tutup :O AWALNYAA!!! last2 ktorang mkn A&W je uwaaaa.. hahah OK what dpt makan gakk :D

DAY 3

sebelum tu pergi taman mini indonesia. hmm tempat dia best tapi kena balik awal so tak dpt nak mentelaah tempat tu lama2 :( uwaaaaaa sob2. here we come BANDUNG!!!! hihih sebenarnya bandung nampak lebih bertamadun drpd jakarta and im so seriously hahah betul!!! hihi ... di sini lahh cerita tentang kehidupan Indonesia bermula... MACET SKALI!! *jam hahah... kami dalam perjalanan ke tangkuban perahu. tiba2 saya perasan semua orang menjual benda yang sama sepanjang jalan :O mcm mana nak untung??? kalau nak ckp kehidupan mereka lebih susah daripada orang Malaysia.. IM SO SERIOUS!!

cuba bayangkan sepanjang jalan diorang jual benda ni

hmmm semakin hari aku semakin memikirkan hal ini.. benda mcm ni mereka jual ada ke orang nak beli? huh-__- tiba dekat tangkuban perahu je. YA ALLAH cantik sungguh ciptaanMu.. belum masuk part saya kena tipu.. hmm saya beli 10 keychain dgn harga 150 000 :O hahah MAHAL GILER!!! dah tu mcm mana org tu ikut je mana2 aku pergi terpaksalah aku beli :O scary betul mamat tu...

selepas itu kami terus berangkat ke hotel malam tu kami makan agak western juga lahh hihihi...

SHEEDAAAAAAP!!!

tiba2 masa nak balik kami nak melintas jalan. orang kedai tu sanggup tahankan kereta semua.. baru saya perasan di sana mereka sangat menghormati customer. yup mmg lah negara kita maju tapi bila sampai bab jual beli ni kadang2 ramai jugak orang melayu yang tak reti ambil hati customer. tgk lahh mereka yang sgt menghargai customer.. TERLEBIH HARGAI.. semua tempat pun mcm tu tapi kami lupa nak bagi duit tips sorry ya pakk nak cepat masa tu.. mereka meneliti masalah.. hotel pun mcm tu jugak.. SAYA TABIK SPRING!!!!

DAY 4

kami pergi ke pasar baru (: pergi sana sini... beli barang itulah inilahh.. barang semua cantik2!! sekali sekala aa orang heret air penuh dalam satu troli. dia jual air. nanti dia ckp : bak air bak.. beli lahh bak. macam2 air ada. saya ckp : ngak apa2. saya ngak mahu. saya udah punya air. bak beli lah bak buat pecah telur.. *pecah telur = first customer. me : tak mau.. beberapa kali juga lahh org mcm tu yg lalu lalang. last skali ada satu budak tu lalu

penjual : bak air bak.. beli lahh bak

mak :tak nak

penjual : bak air bak.. beli lahh bak

my mum ended giving him some money without buying any water. that guy is around my age and im so certain about that.

penjual : *stares my mum for a while. he looks to the money and said ALHAMDULILLAH

then he comes to me and said the same thing.

me : tak mau

i said the same thing for a few times. then i look he went with a really sad face. A REALLY SAD ONE. im really dissapointed.

keadaan yang riuh rendah dalam kedai tu tukar senyap sepi je. i think it is because of me rejecting his barang jualan. and until now i felt so guilty. if i had the ability to turn back the time i would do so by buying any drinks from him.

dah habis berjual beli kami pun keluar lahh... kak yeen pulak sibuk membeli dkt dlm since kami dah nak balik terpaksalah kami tunggu di tepi tangga for kak yeen to come. dalam pada berdiri dkt tepi tangga tu ada satu budak ni younger then me comes. he sells key chain, fridge magnet and so on. there is a lot of people sell the same thing as him.

he asked me

guy : bak mau beli bak? ada mcm2 ni.

me : enggak mau. saya udah beli tadi

guy : beli lagi

me : enggak papa saya enggak mau

* then i kept my mouth shut without answering his question. then he goes away. AGAIN I DISSAPOINT SOMEONE.

from far he stared at me. he smiles and show me the keychain. bak mau ya bak. ada gitar, slipar...

then i whispers something to my mum. i said that is cute. then he came towards me.

guy : ni cantik2 bak. showing the keychains that attracted my eyes.

he persuade me to buy something from him

guy : bak ni gitarnya bisa bunyi malam2

*i started laughing

he smiles

guy : bak sliparnya ini bisa dipakai

i laughed again..

hahahahha

then i said : harganya brapa??

guy : 45 000

hmmm BINGO ITS A YES!!! saya mau campur2! 5 gitar 5 slipar. bisa?

guy : hmmm after thinking he said ok

yeah!!!

cute right!!! hihih

then we were trapped in the traffic jam. i mean a human traffic jam. they saw me buying from him. they came towards me and offer the same thing and i reject everthing from them. then we take shelter at another stairs to avoid then suddenly a mat gitar came toward us. he sang a song.

saya tersentak semasa mendengar lagu ni..

Mengapa kau pergi, Mengapa kau pergi

Di saat aku mulai mencintaimu,
berharap engkau jadi kekasih hatiku,
Malah kau pergi jauh dari hidupku,

Menyendiri lagi, Menyendiri lagi,
Di saat kau tinggalkan diriku pergi,
Tak pernah ada yang menhiasi hariku,
Di saat aku terbangun dari tidurku,

Aku inginkan diri mu, datang dan temui aku,
Kan ku katakan padamu, aku sangat mencintai dirimu,
Aku inginkan diri mu, datang dan temui aku,
Kan ku katakan padamu, aku sangat mencinta.......

at first i laughed but at the hotel i translate what he tried to tell me..

mak cik bagi dia some money and he left us.

tiba2 ada dua orang budak dtg minta sedekah. dia ckp dia tak de duit. sekejap lagi bila mak bagi duit ada seorang lagi dtg minta. YA ALLAH INI RUPANYA YANG KAU INGIN TUNJUKKAN PADAKU..

that rings a bell to me

mengapa engkau pergi? - we avoid seeing him at first.

di saat aku mula mencintaimu - he love us bcoz he needs the money

Aku inginkan diri mu, datang dan temui aku, - he wants us to see him. he wants us to tell him what song to sing. not him coming to us and sang any song. he need the MONEY to LIVE LIFE

Kan ku katakan padamu, aku sangat mencintai dirimu,- he love us when he got money from him..

YA ALLAH!!! Maafkan lah aku. Aku tak nampak Ya Allah. Aku buta! Engkau berikan banyak rezeki kepadaku tapi aku tidak pernah mengucapkan syukurku kepadaMu. people said tengok orang somalia hidup susah.. Now i saw it in front of my eyes. he needs the money he works for it. he beg so that we can give them money. they dont care if they need to do works but the thing is the money is HALAL. MASYA ALLAH!!! Maafkan aku kerana terlalu buta dgn nikmat yang telah kau kurniakan ini Ya Allah!

all of it make sense now..

we left to the mode house.. suddenly it rains. the a child bring an umbrella lend their umbrella to the mode house guests. he asked money after that. A SMALL KID!!! YA ALLAH TERLALU BUTA DIRIKU INI KERANA TAK PERNAH MENGUCAPKAN TANDA SYUKURKU KEPADAMU!!! buat apa kalau blaja dpt 8A tapi tak pernah rasa syukur. SYUKUR yang tak pernah didalami ertinya??? YA ALLAH! terima kasih! terima kasih kerana engkau telah sedarkan aku dalam tidur yang nyenyak ini....

then off to shop at the jalan chempelas

there hujan lagi. mak cik suruh budak tu payungkan mak. i stared at him for some time..

YA ALLAH! tangannya menggeletar kesejukan! dia sejuk! tapi demi mencari rezeki dia sanggup kesejukan. mulutnya bergetar seolah-olah ingin berteriak kesejukan. tangannya menggeletar seolah-olah dia tidak lagi mampu menahan sejuk itu. bajunya basah kuyup. dia tetap tabah kan hati memayungkan ibuku. sku tak berdaya melihat dia. aku dalam senyap menyediakan duit untuk diberikan kepadanya walaupun aku tau mak cik akan bayar. setelah selesai tugasnya aku membayarnya. dia meminta 5000 lagi aku tidak hairan memberi 10000 kepadanya kerana itu hanyalah terlalu sedikit jika dibandingkan dengan apa yang dilaluinya.

kejap lagi diuji lagi. bila kereta lalu telah menyebabkan lopak air dkt jalan terpercik dkt saya. mula mcm nak marah but i ended laughing :O kuasa Allah yang menyejukkan hati saya (: alhamdulillah.. *mcm drama lakk scene tu :O

went back pack bags

DAY 5

back to jakarta take flight and HELLO MALAYSIA!!!!

i really hope u readers could take some moral values from my experience. SEMOGA ALLAH MEMBUKA KAN MATAKU DAN HATIKU INI AMIN (: TERIMA KASIH YA ALLAH kerana menghadiahkan ku percutian yang sangat bernilai ini...

hmmm masa balik tu imigresen dia buat masalah lagi!!!! ekhh kalau boleh gigit dah lama aku gigit pegawai dia tu :O kalau mata dia boleh dicucuk nak je aku cungkil hahahah XD just kidding heart attack je...blh pulak kad dlm passport tu hilang!!!! dia tny mana card tu org pun ckp lahh dlm passport.. dia ckp tak de. mana tak cuak :O kalau hilang mcm mana nak balik ke tanag air yang tercinta ni... rupa2nya terjatuh atas meja dia lepas tu nak suruh prang cari takut2 jatuh dkt lantai.. nak buat mcm mana tugas dia.. bukannya salah dia pun..
me : saya udah letak situ pakk
him : enggak ada!!! cari lahh mana tau jatuh
ALHAMDULILLAH everything end well (:

JANGGEUM aaaa u make me crazy mamanim

2011-12-21T08:14:00.000-08:00

ye mama.. kamsa hamida :P

i wanted to be loved by somebody like MIN. he gave everything to janggeum.. his life, career, love everything so that she would achieve her dreams ;)
감사 대장금 당신은 우정, 사랑과 고통에 대해 가르쳤다. 다시 한번 감사드립니다

nano i blame u for this pictures hahah

2011-12-20T07:14:00.000-08:00

2011-12-20T06:19:00.001-08:00

ohh ahha

2011-12-20T06:02:00.000-08:00

ishhh pegang duit sampai beratus ribu tapi still masih tak kaya UUUWWWWAAAAAAAAA :'( hahah ekhh malam tadi tgk cerita coklat & vanilla!!! OMG rindu giler school when i <3 to pick a fight with someone :DD

TODAY

2011-12-20T02:53:00.000-08:00

haissshh i really miss most of my frenz :( UWWAAAAAAA X( i dont know why i just feel like crying today :((( i miss to talk to hanani, i miss gossipping with amy, a miss nano like crazy, i miss everyone!!!! YUP and them too... i really need a vacation :( today tat sdc kakak call me.. she said test hari khamis ni tak de.. so blh tak dtg hari jumaat sbb jpj offline... blh dtg hari jumaat tak?? i said akak tak blh lahhh.. she asked me why and i said im going for vacation.. HMMM last year i went to langkawi with kak yeen n kak tasha <3 the first night we had a car accident :( so we didnt really enjoy the whole holiday.... this thursday im going to indonesia with my mum,mak cik and kak yeen... *credit to mak cik for arranging everything THANK U MAK CIK!! huh.. im just hoping that this holiday goes well.. im really tired.. IM EXHAUSTED, PLZ i really need a holiday.. i just want things run smoothly.. i really want to enjoy every second there.. plzz. YA RABB BANTU LAH KAMI JAUHKAN LAH KAMI DARIPADA SEGALA YANG TIDAK DIINGINI AMINN...

hari ini

2011-12-19T06:02:00.000-08:00

hmmm then my mum pergi daftar kann my name pergi haji.. YA ALLAH LAMBATNYA --->2043??? huh pray for the best coz behind of every events sure there is a reason (;

IM in LOVE with Jorge, Alexa and Eliana Narvaez ~.~

2011-12-15T18:44:00.000-08:00

THEY ARE JUST SOOO ADORABLE <3 AAAAWWW!!!

MR. HIM

2011-12-13T06:44:00.000-08:00

well amy said : rosy kalau dah jodoh tak ke mana

hahahah amy u know what i always feel happy when the 'somebody' texted me.. why?? he makes me laugh reading his words.. and i will definitely be excited when i see his message on my phone screen.. i wouldnt stay much longer and just snap it and read his message. and everytime i see him i'll go to him because i knew i will definitely end up with a broad smile from ears-to-ears??? hahah.. but the feeling is not a special feeling for the person i <3.. he is just a normal friend to me.. nothing special about him that make me fall for him.. SO i would like to say he is not for me.. there is someone better than me waiting for him outside there and im so sure that he love her from the bottom of his heart (= maybe you are not aware that i knew him since i was a small kid.. so yeah! me and him??? never meant to be together.. My Special Love Is Only For My Husband... *if i get married as i really had a TRAGIC experiece with the males so the experience asked me to just stay away from special relationship with guys..

CONCLUSION : I WILL BE SINGLE AND ALWAYS AVAILABLE until marriage come into my life

so do not talk about special realtionship because im heartless in this topic i can hear but i cant give a good opinion..

*cm was a great guy ive ever met but im not meant for him NEVER

*i broke up with FT since he acted in the SGMEN advertisement hahah

-THE END-

my heart and backbone

2011-12-12T05:30:00.000-08:00

when i started crying and i knew that i had nowhere to go and no one could hear my tears... deep inside my heart i knew someone is seeing me and hearing my problems.. the ONLY ONE who knows every single problem of mine. THE ONLY ONE who loves me when no one are there for me. THE ONE who kept me strong at all times. MY GOD ALLAH!! YA RABB, thank you for giving me ur nikmat! ALHAMDULILLAH! Im still far away from you plz show me the right path.. AMEEN!

the second one is my prophet. i <3 him and that is why i felt like without him im just a fish without air. YA RASULULLAH plz help me. i need your help and i am deeply need ur help im no naive in life. everyone would be shocked seeing the real me.. i really need ur guidance YA RASULULLAH...

the third one my mother!!! mak i <3 u!!! u always scold me while cooking.. u always scream @ me everytime i did wrong.. but when i say u r the one who gave birth to me, she is the one who teach me about life, she is the one who scold me everytime i did wrong so that i would not repeat the same mistake.. what should i say?? i can never pay her back.. i cant do it in any means..

the 4th one is my friends.. hanani a person that i can share every single details of my life.. hanani im sorry if i made u feel bored and annoyed because of my stories.thank you for giving me advice. thanks for everything..
next amy!! hahah amirah akhyar (: a person that i will contact to fill my time and laugh till the end.. a person who burn my spirits when i feel sad... hahah gaspard <3 kann amy?? LoL!
next -----> SARA!! a person i can trust and i can talk to.. ekhh sara i miss u lorhhh!!! i miss gossiping with you and marah2 boss until dia insane :P padan muka :DD baikkan i nii.. hihi muahhahahahhah
ama-nano-myra-ami-aidil they are the one who i'll go and tell everything when i feel sad and lose hope.. they will definitely cheer me up yowhh..

The 5th one is my cousin!!!! yeahh!!! una is like my best friend... kakak is like my sister.. and kak shuk is like grandmother ahahahhah.. dah lama tak jumpa kakaks2 ku ini.. i really miss them sooooooo much :DDD

well in my list there is no my guy friend as i not really close with them.. so i dont really share stories with them and usually they are my place to cheer me up!! so i shall not mention their names (=

MY SCHOOL LIFE :O

2011-12-09T07:49:00.000-08:00

yeahh!!! school??? im no longer a school student :( honestly school taught me not only about education but friendship, leadership and so on. do i sound like a prefect? derrr i am! hahah..

i'll wake up @ 5.30 and go to school at 6.50a.m. wohooo. than i'll gonna check the bd whether it is lock or not as i work in there... yes i usually be the first to sit in front of the computer and start key-in data for the school record. well i just dont wanna explain more details about that.. than there is this junior sit beside me and we'll start gossipping and chit-chatting. Actually holding this post is the toughest throughout 5 years as a prefect. rr why??? there comes this teacher who always complain about my work although i did every single thing that i need to do.. Alhamdulillah i still made it till i step down. *thanks zahin & marissa for being by my side all the time. u know what i mean (;

i'll never be bored in bd either:DD hehe because

MR HEIKAL!!! hahah everytime im bored i'll go to his PA room
me : HEIKAAAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *with a happy face :DD weird isnt it
Heikal : *stares with a weird face JOM debate
me : OK! about???
heikal : protein
me : NO!!! tu kau lahh menang
heikal : hmmm OK! pasal bilik kita
me : YEAH!!! OK!
after 5 minuter debating
me : dah ahhh aku malas nak debate dgn kau.. merapu je
heikal : yes aku menang
me ; -____-'
besides heikal, my twins will definitely come into the bd.. n yeahh we always quarrel about little and small things haahhah...
and then i'll continue my journey to my <3 class!!! haahah
*first impression going into the class - ish mamat ni!!!!! aku hempok jugak karang!!!!! menyampahnyaaa!!!! hahha who?? that guy sitting behind me lahhh sape lagii!! hahahha

adushhhh mamat ni!!!! suka suki cari pasal sama aku!!! hahahha. ada je helah kau kan arif.. kau salah pun aku jugak yang kena. one word for u boy KEJAM!!!!
owhh so if i feel uneasy or depressed i'll go to tado!!! the ustaz who'll make me feel better by laughing

pic^
tado : weyh syidah ni ke post model kau?
me : aku cuba nak tiru gaya kau :O
hahahha.. owhh yeahh!!! i never forget the girls

ama is always a place for me to say it all hahah. THANKS AMALINA WOO!!!! hihi
nano!!! hahah my twins who i <3 to bully.. but she always bully me even more-__-'
ami whom i can share my experience and stories especially malay story
izzati a place where i can go manja2 with her hihi
vic and reanu : people that i can have fun with LOL~ and a place where i can ask questions since i was always scolded by my teacher -____-
alyaa i will always miss ur stories!!! u <3 gossip kann!!!! hihi i miss u jugakk!!!

i can never forget jonny and isaac!!! hahah.. i really miss the circle <3 i miss where i start the conversation and make two of them fight. jonny i can say that througout the year u make me suffer seeing u do add maths like playing basketball. but actually u make me feel that i need to work harder. and because of u i can never say im good in maths as i wanted to get a higher marks for ADD MATHS AND MOD MATHS.. well sometimes you really become my backbone.. thanks jonny for being a really great friend (=

owh yeahh man!!! i miss my life yowhh but still its all over. i cant return back to the past and correct each single wrong things that i did but what i need to do is just to go on with my life and say thank you to the past because teaching me a lot of thing.. guys i really love you guys!! thank you for making me crying for happiness.. i can never see the happiness in life if u guys are not there. well i knew that you guys seems to bully me but actually in returned you guys made me laugh.. and when i looked back i cant stop laughing seeing when arif and me keep quarrelling because of small and little things, when our class make fun of the teachers, when nano and ami makes jokes, when i called awoo!!!, when the teachers starts to scold me although i didnt do anything wrong. all those experience really make me who am i today..

MY FINAL CLASS PART!!! OWH YEAHH!!!!

2011-12-07T19:38:00.000-08:00

5 JUJUR I <3 U GUYS!!!!!
hehe (: well 7 DECEMBER 2011 is such an awesome day for me :DD our class party was held @ adrina's condo. its just amazing. OK lets starts from the beginning.

I went to kastam fetch ami and nano. And here we come STERLING CONDO!!! as soon as we arrived there owhh *sighh we saw NIZAR!! hahahh then we went to the pool where the class party was held.. THEN
this is what happened...

both of this guys really make me happy when im sad. BUT the guy on my left like to pick a fight with me :O

yeahh!!! BBQ people (:

i cant agree more ama he wants to see his face in every picture -__-'

hihi!!

5 JUJUR ROCKZ!!!

my mom warn me not to swim so what i can do is just put me feet into the water :(

enjoy people!!! that pool is ours!!! for the time being :P

eheee my friend who willing to hear everything when i dont feel good

ehheee gadis lemah lembut :O

do we look like we are swimming or something???

SNAPPING PICTURES :DD jyeahh!!! hahah.. well i didnt swim but i still i can enjoy the moments with my classmates (: well i bought tshirt for the exchange present session and i got from izzati THANK YOU AWAKSS!!! i just love the present so much yoe!! hehe.. we had barbeque isaac brought marinated chicken with lemon. Intan brought lasagna, tado err spaghetti, ME??? MASHED POTATO!! hehe..

owh yeahh!! enjoy?? enjoy jugak but still we dont leave our prayer! ALHAMDULILLAH (: well i think thats my last jemaah prayer with my classmates. Kimy was the imam.. hehe i just couldnt forget the kain batik incident AND the SOLAT QADA incident. heheh @ 8.00++ i went back.. well i just couldnt forget how much fun i was in the party ;DD that was a really awesome one guys <3

if i could go anywhere for my vacation i would love to go to

2011-12-01T18:47:00.000-08:00

MASJIDIL HARAM, MASJIDIL AQSA AND MASJIDIL NABAWI... WHY??

MASJIDIL HARAM

Muslims holds that the Mosque was first built by the angels before the creation of mankind, whenGod ordained a place of worship on Earth to reflect the house in heaven called al-Baytu l-Ma'mur (Arabic: البيت المعمور, "The Worship Place of Angels"). From time to time, the Mosque was damaged by a storm (flood) and was rebuilt anew. According to Islamic belief it was rebuilt by Ibrahim, with the help of his sonIsmail. They were ordered by God to build the mosque, and the Kaaba. The Black Stone (Hajar-ul-aswad)is situated on the lower side of the eastern corner of the Kaaba, believed to be the only remnant of the original structure made by Ibrahim. The Kaaba is the direction for all the Muslims to pray across the globe thus signifying unity among all. The Islamic teaching specifically mentions that nothing is miraculous about the Grand Mosque except for the oasis Zamzam which has purportedly never dried since it was revealed.

MASJIDIL NABAWI

often called theProphet's Mosque, is a mosque situated in the city of Medina. As the final resting place of the Islamic prophet Muhammad, it is considered the second holiest site in Islam by Muslims (the first being the Masjid al-Haram inMecca) and is one of the largest mosques in the world. The mosque is under the control of the Custodian of the Two Holy Mosques. It is the second mosque built in history.One of the most notable features of the site is the Green Dome over the center of the mosque, where the tomb of Muhammad is located. It is not exactly known when the green dome was constructed but manuscripts dating to the early 12th century describe the dome. It is known as the Dome of the Prophet or the Green Dome.^[1] Subsequent Islamic rulers greatly expanded and decorated it. Early Muslim leaders Abu Bakr and Umar are buried in an adjacent area in the mosque.The site was originally Muhammad's house; he settled there after his Hijra (emigration) to Medina, later building a mosque on the grounds. He himself shared in the heavy work of construction.
MASJIDIL AQSA
Al-Aqsa Mosque (Arabic:المسجد الاقصى al-Masjid al-Aqsa, IPA: [ʔælˈmæsʒɪd ælˈʔɑqsˤɑ] ( listen), "the Farthest Mosque,") also known as al-Aqsa, is the third holiest site in Sunni Islam and is located in the Old City of Jerusalem. The site on which the silver domed mosque sits, along with the Dome of the Rock, also referred to as al-Haram ash-Sharif or "Noble Sanctuary,"^[2] is the Temple Mount, the holiest site in Judaism, the place where the Temple is generally accepted to have stood. Muslims believe that Muhammadwas transported from the Sacred Mosque in Mecca to al-Aqsa during the Night Journey.Islamic tradition holds that Muhammad led prayers towards this site until the seventeenth month after the emigration, when God directed him to turn towards the Ka'aba.

YUP IM IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE :DD

2011-12-01T18:31:00.000-08:00

well, actually i knew him since i was small. He is a really great person, a good leader, a romantic husband, well u name it he complete all of those. Once i told my mum can i marry him?? just because i had said there will be NO ONE can melt my heart like he did. I REALLY ADMIRE HIM. he knew me although i didnt even knew him. he LOVES me b4 i could even love him. At the end of his life, he even called for all of us UMMATI! UMMATI! UMMATI!. How can my heart be tough enough to say no from loving him. He went through all kind of challenges so that i can say that IM PROUD TO BE A MUSLIM! Even in the future he will help me to go to heaven. INSYALLAH. its just the matter that did i do enough to repay him. the answer will be I CAN NEVER PAY HIM BACK. he did A LOT for me. He did left me something b4 he died sunnah and Quran. I can never lost with this two guidance. YAA RABB, THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME A GOOD AND GREAT LEADER. I REALLY WANT TO MEET HIM. YA RABB PLZ MAKE IT A REALITY. AMIN. law kana bynana... i would be very happy (:

well the answer for the question that i asked my mom.. IT IS A NO!! why not?? im not good enough for him. im so full of sin but he never did anthing wrong in life because he is PERFECT. yesterday the ustaz told me in his speech :
- Jangan berangan ingin menjadi isteri Rasulullah jikalau engkau tidak sehebat Siti Khadijah.
well im nothing compared to Siti Khadijah. Now realised who i am but i will never stop loving him. PEACE BE UPON YOU YA RASULULLAH SAW AND YOUR FAMILY...

Its Over!!!!

2011-11-30T05:58:00.000-08:00

Well let me tell you something about this school. Ive never wanted to come to this school actually. Maybe it is all because of ... HAHAH. In a blink of eye it is already 5 years!!! SERIOUSLY I ADMIT THAT MY IMPRESSION ABOUT THIS SCHOOL CHANGE!!! 1 word AWESOME!! (Y) our class is just like a family. we shared stories, we laughed @ each other, we celebrate party AND we even had our own outing. SERIOUSLY this class would be the first that i'll miss especially those boys who sometimes really break me into pieces but actually they are the one who always give me chance to laugh and smile. Well im so gonna miss this high school moment <3 So today a very historical day, all of us completed our secondary school life. I still cant believe it ended that fast. IM SO GONNA MISS U GUYS!!!!